Due to his choice of career, my husband and I are often apart during some seasons of life. Usually, it’s during the wintertime, which in itself can be kind of depressing.
I find staying connected with my husband even when we are apart difficult.
Thankfully, it is not always so. We both know the importance of a family that is together. Parenting was never supposed to be a one-person job, and children need both of their parents.
Yet, God did make the woman to be keepers at home, to care for the children, and to guide the home. I want to do that with all joy and faithfulness.
My husband is a logger. He loves his job and provides very well for our family. That being said, we forfeit time together at times.
Less time spent together as husband and wife can cause us to grow apart if we aren’t careful. I find myself getting more independent, and not depending on my husbands’ input quite as often.
That’s not necessarily a bad thing. I know I can go to my husband with any advice I need, but He also expects me to make day-by-day decisions without always seeking his input.
I get good at that. When his work season ends, it’s always a bit of a struggle for me to give back the reins of our home life.
For someone that has never been apart from their husband for more than a couple of days apart, this might be hard to understand.
I Don’t WANT to run the show. My husband is and always shall be the leader of our family. He makes the final decisions.
But in this current season, I HAVE to make a lot of decisions on a daily basis. These are never big decisions, but the little everyday ones.
A consequence of us being apart during the week is we tend to grow more apart. But it doesn’t have to be like that.
Staying connected with your spouse even when you are apart is important for your marriage to thrive.
8 Tips To Stay Connected Wth Your Spouse Even When You’re Apart
Call and Text A Lot
Isn’t technology great? I remember those days when we had no cell phones.
You could use someone else’s home phone, hotel phones (or in our case, camp phones), and phone booths.
But actually having your own personal cell phone was unheard of. We can communicate with each other whenever we want, however long we want (given cell service, that is).
Stay connected with your spouse by talking and texting every day. You don’t need to stay on the phone for hours on end. Just reaching out and connecting every day will help to keep your connection strong.
My husband was never a big talker (although he has gotten much better at that), so we don’t always talk for long.
Just a couple of minutes of talking helps to strengthen your bond.
Make an Effort To Share Your Heart
It’s too easy to just talk about the daily small stuff.
Share what you are struggling with. Ask how he is really doing. I struggle with sharing hard things, so this is something I need to be intentional with.
It’s funny how things seem so large and problematic, but once you share your burden with another, the load lessens considerably.
Sharing each other’s burdens is a vital part of a strong marriage relationship.
Spend Some Quality Time When You See Each Other
My husband is home every weekend, but even then if we don’t make the effort to spend quality time together, the everyday things steal away from us connecting.
Put away those phones, television, and other distractions and spend time together, talking about your dreams.
Struggle to know what to talk about? These conversation starters will help you to deepen your relationship.
Listen Well
Listening well is much more than just hearing words being spoken.
You have to listen to understand. This is a deeper level of listening.
Kind of listening to the heart of the person. What is he communicating, not just with words, but also with body actions etc?
Listening to understand is to listen to the intention behind the words. I’ve been guilty of listening but already having my answer formed before truly understanding what my husband means.
You will grow a deeper connection with your husband if you learn to listen well.
Trust Each Other
Trust issues are something that a lot of women struggle with. Especially when you are apart for a long time, trust issues can arise between you.
First off, be a trustworthy woman.
Be a woman whose husband’s heart is safely entrusted to you.
Don’t speak negatively about your husband behind his back. Build him up even when he is away.
Secondly, surrender your fears to God. If you struggle to trust your husband, you might have a reason.
Evil things do happen in this world. However, take your worries to God. He alone is capable of changing your husband’s heart.
I struggle for years with trusting my husband because I knew he struggled with pornography use. Surrendering it to the Lord was where I was able to have peace.
Keep Him in Your Prayers
If we knew the power of prayer in the spiritual realm, we would spend a lot more time on our knees. This has been on my heart lately.
There are so many distractions that keep me from a strong prayer life and I know it’s the distraction of the devil.
Prayer brings change and protection. Pray for your husband every single day. I fail at this. Life can get so busy that I forget about the important things.
Hide Love Notes in His Luggage
Wife, your words hold a special place in your husband’s heart.
You have the power to speak life over your husband, and the written word does too.
Write him a love note. It will have a special place in his heart. Be his biggest cheerleader and encourager.
Plan Something Extra Special For The weekend
If you only see your husband a couple of days a month or week, then make those days special! I try to clear our weekends so that I am not too busy, although that can be tough.
Plan a special meal, or evening out with friends. You are the one who knows your husband best. My husband actually loves staying home when he is home, so we do that a lot too.
You don’t want your relationship with your spouse to grow apart. Loneliness in marriage is a lot more common than we’d think.
When a husband and wife aren’t connected at the heart, they will struggle with loneliness in marriage.
Keeping your connection strong with your husband when you are apart might take a bit more effort, but it is well worth it.
Don’t stop sharing your life with him just because you aren’t physically together. Live your life with your heart wide open, in marriage and in other parts as well.
