what a great wife is

Qualities of a Good Wife

What makes a wife a GOOD wife? There are many qualities a virtuous wife has, including a humble and meek heart.

From the time we got married, I was determined that I was going to be a good wife. I bought and borrowed books, I read them faithfully and tried to apply everything that I was learning.

After ten years of marriage, after a few major changes in our life, I realized I still knew nothing about being a good wife.

Not only had I grown bitter, but I was also no longer a cheerful mother and wife. I was easily stressed out, very uptight, and my priorities no longer lined up with the priorities of God.

It is only by God’s grace that we can become a good wife, a wonderful spouse to our husband. Once we realize in which areas we fail, we can repent and ask God to work a change in our hearts.

Biblical qualities of a good wife include (but are not limited to) Kindness, Cheerfulness, Submissiveness, Loving, and is God-fearing. There are many other virtues that we could list, but these are a big part of becoming a great wife.

8 Qualities of a Good Wife


Proverbs 31:26 She openeth her mouth with wisdom; and in her tongue is the law of kindness.

This struck me pretty hard. After having children, I realized that my tongue was a problem! I spoke harshly at them much too often.

I took out my frustration and anger on little children. Horrible to think of, but that was the way it was. I still struggle with this, but my prayer is that God will help me have a law of kindness in my tongue.

Everyone around me should be blessed with the Love of God, through the words that I speak.


Proverbs 15:13 A merry heart maketh a cheerful countenance….

Proverbs 17:22 A merry heart doeth good like medicine.

Many men will pick a joyful wife, over a beautiful one.

True beauty comes from the inside and being a joy filled, contented wife is a big blessing that many men take for granted….until they no longer have her. Very often, being happy is a choice that we make. 

I clearly remember one morning I stood up grouchy. My husband commented on my state of mind….I was tempted to be offended.

But I made up my mind right then and there that I was not going to allow this MOOD to ruin my day. Amazing as it is, once I made up my mind not to be unhappy, the grumpiness vanished!

Let’s make a choice to be a joy filled wife, in every area of life.


1 Peter 3:5 For after this manner in the old time the holy women also, who trusted in God, adorned themselves, being in subjection unto their own husbands…

Who can find a submissive wife? I truly believe they are of a rare kind these days.

Being in subjections means exactly what it sounds like… you are under the authority of your husband. A study on 1 Peter 2 and 3 reveals a lot about what it means to be a submissive wife.

A submissive wife is a beautiful blessing to her husband.

Unfortunately, my husband still does not have that blessing completely. Let’s say I am a work in progress, but I am thankful that God promises to finish the work he has started in me.


Titus 2:5 To be discreet, chaste, keepers at home, good, obedient to their own husbands, that the word of God be not blasphemed.

Chaste means to be pure, in heart, dress, and actions. It means to dress modestly, and to act in a way that bring Glory to God.  


1 Peter 3:4 But let it be the hidden man of the heart, in that which is not corruptible, even the ornament of a meek and quiet spirit, which is in the sight of God of great price.

This verse is written directly for wives. Peter tells women that what we wear is not what is of great value to God but rather what is inward. A meek and quiet spirit is in God’s eyes something precious.


Proverbs 31:27 She looketh well to the ways of her household, and eateth not the bread of idleness.

Looking well to the ways of my household means that I take care that we have food in the fridge, clothes and shoes to wear. I am blessed in the fact my husband is the sole breadwinner.

He provides us with the financial means of buying all these things. However, when I am not being diligent, things fall apart. We live a ways away from any town so when i forget to buy cheese or milk, that means my family goes without. 

After realizing that the Proverbs 31 woman looks well to the ways of her household, I realized that I needed to improve. Making a more deliberate effort to become more diligent is the first place to start.

7.Trusts God

Hebrews 2:13 And again, I will put my trust in him. And again, Behold I and the children which God hath given me.

When we can trust God, there is a huge burden that falls off our back.

A lot of women struggle with anxiety over their children. It is only when we place them completely in the trust of our heavenly Father that we can have rest and peace. 

Trusting God is so vital to a strong relationship with our Lord. When we do not trust him, we give in to a fearful spirit.

8.Loves Others

1 Corinthians 13:1-3 Though I speak with the tongues of men and of angels, and have not charity, I am become as sounding brass, or a tinkling cymbal. And although I have the gift of prophecy, and understand all mysteries, and all knowledge; and though I have all faith, so that I could remove mountains, and have not charity, I am nothing. And though I bestow all my goods to feed the poor, and though I give my body to be burned, and have not charity, it profiteth me nothing.

Wow! Wouldn’t you think that if you died for your faith, it would be counted as an honor to you? Yet the Bible teaches us that if we do not have a sacrificial, selfless love for others, it profits us not a thing.

Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It does not dishonor others, it is not self seeking. It is not easily angered, and it keeps no record of wrong doings.

How many of us can say we are very loving? I know I cannot. It is only through Christ in me that there comes any love out of me.

These are all traits that makes a wife a GOOD wife. There are many more, but if we will strive for these, God will show us the way.

Leave a Comment

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *