The role of a godly woman in marriage is different than a man’s and it serves us well to realize and recognize it.
With the divorce rate skyrocketing in the last forty years, it is important that women everywhere understand what their role is in a marriage. Walking in the role God wants us to is
always the right way.
God’s ways are best, always.
A man and a woman meet, fall madly in love, and get married, with visions of a happy life ahead. After all, don’t the stories we read all end happily ever after?
It usually doesn’t take them long, however, to find out that a good marriage only comes out of lots of hard work.
It means giving up self and looking towards serving the other.
That’s not always easy to do. God knew we would be in dire need of direction, so he provided us with the Holy Bible.
For that, I am very grateful. So let’s find out what God intended a woman’s role to be in a partnership meant to last a lifetime.
In Genesis chapter 2, verse 18, we read that God said, “I will make him a help meet for him.” God saw that it was not good that man should be alone.
So he created a helper, a person to be an aid to the man.
So are you an assistant to your husband, or do you long to be the one who is assisted?
I think this is something every woman struggles with, some more than others.
After the fall in the Garden of Eden, God tells Eve, “and thy desire shall be to thy husband, and he shall rule over thee.” Genesis 3:16.
So the struggle began.
In this day and age, with feminism being so prominent, the thought of a woman being under the rule of man repulses women.
Yet, that was God’s doing! Who are we to fight against that?
However, being in submission to a man is not being under a tyrant. I like to think about it as putting my mission under the mission of my husband.
Men were created to lead the family and our country.
Proverbs 31 is a wonderful guideline of a worthy woman. There is so much to strive for.
A very clear guideline of a woman’s role in marriage lies in Titus chapter 2, verses 3-5.
“The aged women likewise, that they be in behavior as becometh holiness, not false accusers, not given to much wine, teachers of good things; that they may teach the young women to be sober, to love their husbands, to love their children, to be discreet, chaste, keepers at home, good, obedient to their own husbands, that the word of God be not blasphemed.”
For the purpose of this post, let’s look at what the older women should teach the younger.
They obviously already knew these things, otherwise, they wouldn’t be teaching them to the younger ones.
This bible verse about the role of a godly woman in the home helps to have a biblical view of a wife’s duties in marriage.
What a Godly Wife Should Do, According to The Bible
1.Be Sober
To be sober means to be thoughtful, wise, self-controlled. Not impulsive, but rather we carefully think about our actions and seek more wisdom.
2.Love Your Husband
Love isn’t just hearts and roses, but to truly love means loving in EVERYTHING, easy and hard. True love seeks not-self but is a sacrificial love.
Seek to know what your husband needs, and take care to fulfill them.
3.Love Your Children
We need to be ready to teach, train, and serve our children.
Invest in your children daily.
Our children help us become less selfish if we put aside our desires to serve them.
4.Be Discreet
A woman without discretion is like a gold ring in a pig’s snout (Proverbs 11:22).
Being discreet is to be polite, honest in the sight of all men, prudent, and courteous. We need to be considerate of others.
5.Be Chaste
Being chaste means to be pure in thoughts, acts, and deeds. Being chaste also means being modest, and not vulgar in speech and action.
6.Be a Keeper at home.
Women are called to guide their homes and manage the welfare of the family. We should look well to the ways of our household, and take care of the little things.
7.Be the Good Wife
There is no one truly good except God, and we should strive to be of a favorable character, agreeable, pleasant, honorable.
Being good also means we are kind to the ones around us.
8.Be Obedient to your own husband
Obey? Really? So hard to swallow, yet I should be submissive to the will of my husband, willing to obey.
This might be the hardest one of them all, but we are called to be obedient to our own husband.
Not when he asks you to do something that goes contrary to God’s will, but when it goes against your own, we need to obey.
I’m in no way advocating that we become pushover ladies.
However, after stating our views on the situation, we need to leave it in God’s hands and follow what our husband decides.
I have found that if I am able to give up my Self, my selfishness, and my pride, it goes a long way in building a better relationship.
One thing is certain, you will never be able to change your husband. Many have tried, only to end up in divorce.
By being “in subjection to your own husband, if any obey not the word, they also may without the word be won by the conversation of the wives; While they behold your chaste conversation coupled with fear.” 1 Peter 3:1, 2.
We as women can only seek to make our part better, that the man in our life will be won. I always find it interesting that it says without the word.
It’s not up to us to teach them right from wrong but to be a picture of godliness to them.
A woman’s role is different than a man’s but no less important.
When a couple operates in the correct role that God made for them, everything runs more smoothly.
Please, be encouraged! Do your part well, pray, and watch God work a miracle in your life. A wonderful marriage is possible.
Become a godly wife by reading the bible, and asking God for his help in becoming who he created you to be.
I do not agree with this at all.
What a great article that talks about what a woman should do and what a woman should be in marriage. And where are the duties of a man? Or is it only a woman who owes something in marriage? Marriage is a union of two, rights and responsibilities, everything is divided into two. The responsibility for happiness in the family lies equally with the husband and wife.
I can say that excessive demands in marriage to one foster a sense of permissiveness in the other spouse. This is how my marriage became. My husband became a real tyrant and terrorized not only me, but also our children. But as soon as he became violent with children, I was no longer going to endure it. I read the child laws , prepared the necessary documents and filed for divorce. I received sole custody, and now he lives alone. And he suffers from this, because he no longer has anyone to vent his anger with, he has no one to suppress. And my children and I live beautifully and I am incredibly glad that I decided on this.
Hi Virginia, marriage is absolutely a union of two. This article wasn’t directed to husbands, as I don’t write to encourage them. I am so sorry that you and your children suffered because of your husband. Violence should NEVER be tolerated. You are responsible for your children, and if you turn a blind eye when they are being subjected to abuse, then you are partly to blame as well. I am glad God granted you the strength to remove yourself and your kids from a violent marriage.
The Bible also says that men should respect women as equals. “Husbands, in the same way be considerate as you live with your wives, and treat them with respect as the weaker partner and as heirs with you of the gracious gift of life, so that nothing will hinder your prayers” (1 Pet. 3:7, NIV).
Absolutely! A husband’s role is so important in a relationship as well.
That is, ineed, being a pushover. Letting someone else have their way, all the time, even when you don’t like or agree or think that decision is right. That is exactly what a pushover is. No thank you, that’s definitely NOT me.
Very often it comes down to giving up our own selfish desires. However, I don’t believe that women are without a voice. If our husband doesn’t agree with us, take it to the Lord in prayer, and ask Him to change the heart of your husband.
I would say being a pushover is not speaking up at all, not even so much as a peep. Being a pushover is not the same thing as “Here is my opinion, now that take into consideration when you decide, and I’ll follow you and honor you.” Someone needs to make the final call. And I have my thoughts, but I’m not always right. I won’t be the person to kick and scream when I don’t get my way. The way modern women get riled up at the thought of obeying their husbands, even when their husbands are good men, shows that some of us value ourselves over our marriages, our “need to be right” over our need to come to an agreement. If you married him, you can trust him. If you trust him, respect him. And your need to be in charge? For me, that’s where I say “No thank you, that’s definitely NOT me.”