Working on yourself first is an important first step in improving your marriage. Here you’ll read about 5 ways on how to improve yourself instead of working on improving your husband.
Do you realize that maybe there is room for improvement in your own character? Then this post is for you! There are many things you can do to strengthen your marriage.
I had never realized how much of a spoiled brat I was until we got married. As long as I got my way, I was happy!
Then I got married, and now there were two people that were self-centered and spoiled. That caused many an argument. I had wonderful parents, and they loved us and raised us as well as they could, but what I didn’t realize until after we got married, that I was not use to being told NO. Not use to changing my plans for someone else, not use to giving in.
But we learn, and we grow, if we allow God’s molding hand. Eleven years later, I am still learning and growing. I am thankful that God, and my husband, don’t give up on me easily.
Five Ways To Be A Better Wife and Improve Your Marriage
Grow In Holiness
That spoiled brat my husband married? She had to grow in her relationship with God before that truly changed (I am still working on that!).
But only when our lives are Christ-centered can we truly become less self centered. An awareness of how much our carnal nature seeks to please self can help us to realize that life is not all about me, but rather all about God.
Without God in the center of your life, no marriage will thrive. Remember to not play the blame game, blaming your spouse for everything.
This is such an easy trap to fall into. No one wants to be the one at fault, but we need to remember to look at yourself first.
Ask God to show you where he wants you to change.
I find that if I allow God to work in me and am open to his voice, he gently shows me areas that he wants me to change.
God is faithful! He helps us if only we ask. Ask God to show you where you need to change, and be open to his voice. God doesn’t shout but speaks in a small, quiet voice.
He knows your heart, and if you are willing to change.
Laugh Often
Maybe think a sense of humor is a gift that not all have, but the truth is that a sense of humor is cultivated. Start by looking for humorous moments in everyday life.
For example, we drive a dump of an SUV. It’s rusted, and reminds me of an old cranky man. It’s the perfect example of a ‘Dave car’(if you’re familiar with Dave Ramsey). Yet, it still drives.
So I choose to laugh over our rust bucket….and again when you get a flat in front of the post office, you wonder how long you’ve been driving around with a flat. You decide to laugh, instead of becoming angry about the situation.
Granted, there are times it feels impossible to laugh, but with practice you’ll be more easily be able to find the humour in situations.
Accept Each Other
Acceptance is overdone in this world. Are we supposed to accept sin and evil?
No, that is not God’s plan. However, accepting who God made your husband to be is something every wife has to accept. Not everyone has the same qualities and gifts, and contentment with godliness is great gain. Contentment brings much happiness.
Be Content.
Godliness with contentment is great gain and discontentment causes great unhappiness. At times in our marriage, I have wished that my husband was more outgoing and willing to be more adventurous.
I had to learn that I cannot change him, and remember that he has many other wonderful qualities. Also, if I keep in mind that there are things that my husband would choose to change about me, it is a bit easier to accept the difficult things about him.
Accepting that you need to give in, become less self centered, and that God is in control are all crucial to having a healthy marriage relationship.
A healthy marriage doesn’t come by accident and is in no way a one sided relationship. If we look to ourselves, however, to see how we can improve, we can improve our marriage. After all, we are half of the couple!
Try these five marriage tips for wives and see if your marriage improves.
How has your marriage been doing? Let me know in the comments below.